Day 1

He has been alone in the eastern most tip of the United States for less than 24 hours, but already his grasp of human interaction is slipping away. Below is a quick note he sent to my friends (via carrier Bald Eagle mind you):

"Tried to deposit my check at a chase bank in EH...this was my exchange with the fat blond branch manager lady

I need to deposit a check but I bank with citi
Ahhhhh I'm sorry to hear that, haha
Yeah well I worked there
Ohhh well I'm sorry to hear that too, haha
Right so what are my options?
Well there's a citi in hampton bays 20 miles away or you can open up an account
With you?
Yes
Oh no thanks
Oh gosh...tom look at his face, he's disgusted, ahahah, look at him tom

Luckily she's a nice guy, so I just walked away.

But

If I was wearing my CK Edge she woulda gotten, "Listen up, hairdoo!! I helped fortune 100 companies raise billions of dollars in the capital markets. You help Grandmas write cute notes on the memo lines of their checks. Do not FUCK with me!!"

Now, back to my book on the beach

G'day,
Chris"

Stay tuned for more...